How can you be a good listener to your friend's problems?
If you want to be a good listener to your friend's troubles, here are simple tips with which you can comfort your friend :
1.Relax down , don't over pressurize someone to tell you just speak normally , just say like that If you feel you want to tell it to me , I'm always here.
2.Don't interrupt in between.
3.Ask few questions to ensure that you are properly following up and to make sure to your friend that you've your interest alive.
4.While listening to the problems of other people , don't talk about yourself but about your friend and his/her life.
5.In the first sitting , make the person believe that he's strong enough by saying "You are really very stable if I would have been at your place , I don't know what would I've done ?"
6.Good days will come , make your friend believe this.
7.Take small breaks and give other person a shoulder to trust on.
8.Don't laugh on his/her problems.
9.Try to remember main points of his/her story.
10.Ask his/her emotions and feelings about the different phases he/she went through.
11.In the start , don't begin attacking , try convincing your fellow by love , wisdom , don't involve your emotions like don't force other person to follow your advices, you can only give the reasons now it's unto the other person to believe or not , don't start arguing and don't lose your temper.
12.In the end , always say goodbye with a good hope giving sentence and "Whenever you need me , I'm ready to help you anytime".
13. Don't blame or criticize someone when they are in mid of their conversation, let them finish first with what they want to say. And criticism over something that has already happened is not going to undo the things.
Written by Dr.Muhammad Wasif Haq, Islamabad, Pakistan.
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